God Spoke in Wayne's World
God Spoke in Wayne’s World
Years ago I had an interesting and what I consider somewhat amazing moment in a movie theatre. At that time in my life, my mid-twenties, I was working on staff at a church. I was wholly focused on my relationship with God, and wholly focused on finding a relationship with a man. I wanted to get married, have children, and settle down. I was definitely the “settling down” type of girl, without any settling prospects in my immediate future.
As being a young woman focused on God and church, ministry and serving, I had made a promise to myself not to watch movies with certain ratings or themes. Being single and seeking a life of integrity, it just made sense to avoid these types of films. However, in a moment of despair, I gave in. I went to see a Rate PG-13 movie, which at that time in my life was not something that I did, though I will admit I have seen many since then.
The movie I went to see was Wayne’s World. The despair was yet another rejection by a man I considered to have great potential. I was devastated. I needed to laugh. I needed to laugh so hard I would cry with hilarity- I needed Mike Myers. Natalie’s world needed to disappear into Wayne’s World. I had heard it was funny, so I went to see it despite my then strict commitment to “PG.” And in this theatre, in the moments before I was about to watch something that I was thought would probably challenge a few of my morals… God spoke to me. He didn’t just put a happy thought in my head, he spoke- loud and clear. The message was one I could not deny and one I would never forget.
During my twenties I had many relationships, though “relationally” I was quite a late bloomer, having my first real boyfriend at 20. I believe that some people are just wired for holiness… that was me (and I hope still is). I was and still am a rule-follower to the “T”, especially when it comes to the what I know God wants of me, though I will admit that life experience can fade the lines at times.
My relationships were at times few and far between. Sometimes, frequent… always changing! During one season, I had what I refer to as a “Series of Unfortunate Blind Dates”. How many times can well-intentioned friends set one up with homosexuals, narcissists, and desperate men? Nothing against them, but clearly they weren’t interested in me! Finally I put my foot down, no more blind dates- even if it was with George Clooney!
This particular afternoon I was reeling from another broken relationship- and my heart was pummeled once again. Of course at that point in time I felt it was spread all over my body in tiny shards and that they would never find their way back to one another- destined to cause internal bleeding for the rest of my life. The man I had such strong feelings for had cheated on me, a first that I knew of, with of all things, a younger woman. I was, after all, only 26 years old. Who could be younger?
Off to the movies I went; dressed up, hair done, make up perfect (because my theory was “you never know where you are going to meet your husband.” I was a focused young woman, to be sure). At the theatre I made way for the concession stand. I never, ever, would see a movie without ten dollars worth of popcorn and soda. It was and still is a matter of principal for me. As I was sitting in the empty theater, I recall the overwhelming sense of grief that I felt. What was wrong with me? Why wasn’t I wanted? Why did other girls have no problem getting boyfriends, keeping them, and turning them into devoted life partners? Why couldn’t I manage to make this happen? Why was I devoid of beauty, personality, and interest? I simply couldn’t understand it and I remember many times in my twenties feeling great despair that no one wanted me.
As I sat there feeling the powerful emotions of rejection, the lights dimmed in the theatre and the movie screen started to flicker. Okay, I thought, let’s get through the 20 minutes of previews I’m not interested in and get on with the hilarity, which my heart so desperately needs. But, God knew what my heart needed. It needed a word from Him, and He was about to give it to me in place I would have never expected it!
As the music began I realized that I was familiar with the song playing. I wondered to what preview this belonged. As the image on the screen came into full view in this secular movie theatre, BeBe Winans (gospel singer) looked into my eyes, into my heart, and began to sing,
Troubles wills come
Troubles will go
When its all said and done
One thing I know,
It’s gonna be alright.
Just the way He planned it
It’s gonna be okay
So hold on.
I sat there stunned, silently crying. Not with hilarity, not because of the funny images on the screen, not even because my heart was broken, but because God knew exactly where I was. In a little movie theatre, in Bedford, Texas, alone, God knew me. He knew I needed to hear the words; most of all He knew I needed to hear the words when I least expected them and so desperately needed them.
I love this memory in my life. I love it because scripture says, “God will perfect all that concerns me.” He is in the details… and this was a prime example of that. He was in the theatre- waiting to wow me in the most unusual, and often unholy of places. I obviously got over the heartbreak and the little shards of heart-glass made their way back wholeness. From that particular rejection, there isn’t even a scratch left. The moment, the song, the words, were the beginning of healing. I walked out of that theater with a deep security in knowing I was loved by the One who mattered. He accepted me for who I was, the woman he created.
I have been trying to recall recently all the details I have found Him in. As I remember them, I’m going to write them down. I want to be able to remember them when I find myself in a season of despair. During the hard times, it’s sometimes difficult to remember the sweet and unexpected moments of His grace. If I look, though, I can find Him- even in the movies. Even in Wayne’s World.
Natalie Jager
January, 2008
posted by Natalie Jager @ 8:34 AM
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